Call Me S http://callmes.com when one day i grow old, will you still love me so? Thu, 16 Feb 2012 01:15:49 +0000 en hourly 1 123456 http://callmes.com/posts/473.html http://callmes.com/posts/473.html#comments Thu, 16 Feb 2012 01:15:49 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/?p=473 1. deadline前两天终于开始写proposal, 渐渐意识到生活进入另一个阶段了, 总是这样后知后觉, 浪费不少时间.

2. 吉村下了两场雪, 雪中的Bath特别美. 三个人的旅途很愉快. 旅游算是找回自己的一部分.

3. 狠心买了airbook, 生活又变得更美好. 爸爸还是很宠我, 默默的告诉自己不能让爸妈失望.

4. 情人节过得很特别. 五星级酒店的下午茶, 真是受宠若惊. 坐在taxi里看伦敦街头的人群, 有种不真实的电影感.

5. 我总是幸运的那一个, 感激都压在心里, 不知道怎么说出来.

6. 一定要做更好的自己.

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/473.html/feed 0 paradox http://callmes.com/posts/467.html http://callmes.com/posts/467.html#comments Wed, 25 Jan 2012 02:39:28 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/?p=467 i still remember the morning when i woke up and found everything about him was gone

no socks on the floor, no shoes behind the door, no t-shirts lying at the corner

“when i opened the door, and you were not there any more”

it was kinda shock at the beginning, then went to heartache, then went to tears

it was my way to say goodbye when i was the one to leave

but when i was the one who stayed, it was something i can’t stand

 

months later, i got an email from a friend, he ended up with “never be afraid to say goodbyes”

almost brought me to tears, i know i was never able to do that

 

 

they say when u grow up, u will learn how to pretect urself from getting hurt

actually it’s simply, u just don give that much then u won’t get hurt

but how can u say love when u’r holding back ur feelings?

it’s unreasonable.

 

it’s a paradox.

it’s called love.

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/467.html/feed 3 3:38 http://callmes.com/posts/466.html http://callmes.com/posts/466.html#comments Thu, 19 Jan 2012 03:38:53 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/?p=466 running out of cigarettes, so i drinked a little before i went to bed.

no worries please, i’m not addicted.

 

the exams are kinda pushing me too hard,

waking up everyday feeling exhausted.

guess i’ve been drinking coffee too much these days,

becuz i’m either too energetic or too tired..

 

i think i need something to cheer me up,

oh yes, i just bought new shoes,

but they’re not here yet..

 

feels great to talk to myself in the middle of the night..

relaxing, and real.

 

18590016_副本

if we can’t go back..

then.. let’s just stay where we are.

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/466.html/feed 1 遗憾 http://callmes.com/posts/463.html http://callmes.com/posts/463.html#comments Tue, 17 Jan 2012 02:21:02 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/?p=463 记得以前每次和爸妈逛街, 很多自己喜欢的东西总是被妈妈一票否决掉.

这个时候爸爸就会摸摸我的头说, 人生要留点遗憾才好, 知道吗?

在遗憾的情绪里, 我当然不懂, 为什么要留遗憾, 完美不是更美好?

 

长大之后虽然开始觉得爸爸的话有道理, 可还是很任性的买下所有喜爱的物品.

然后发现很多最后都被闲置一旁, 最后扔掉的时候甚至都不会觉得可惜.

 

现在和朋友们聊天时的话题总是离不开感情.

刚到英国的一个月很奇怪, 身边几乎所有女生朋友都在感情里挣扎.

每天都会听到各种抱怨, 无非是我很喜欢你, 你却不那么在乎我, 怎么办?

最后结论总是归结到: 因为没有完全得到过, 因为有遗憾.

 

得不到的才是最好的, 有遗憾的感情才会让自己越陷越深.

即使知道自己是在受伤害, 却还是想要坚持到”得到”的那一天.

不撞南墙不回头的年纪其实已经过去了, 我们嘴上说着要对自己更好,

可是还在坚持什么?

 

到现在朋友们的感情问题差不多都算解决掉了.

有放弃的, 但是会经常回忆在一起时的美好, 会说如果回到当初如何如何.

有得到的, 但是已然不像从前那般投入, 抱怨的点也慢慢变成琐碎的小事.

有妥协的, 认定了得不到才是最好, 那就让他最好吧.

 

我自认为总是很幸运, 遇到的人都待我很好.

遗憾的事情不多, 即便遇到, 也还是想要拼个筋疲力尽.

遗憾的总是更神秘, 放到感情里, 就应了那句歌词:

得不到的总是在骚动, 被偏爱的都有恃无恐.

 

人总是会变, 爱的人不同, 喜欢的品位不同, 遗憾的美丽却是永恒.

也许有一天我也会坦然的面对遗憾, 不争不抢, 不吵不闹, 把它当成美好细心保存.

 

 9

每次路过Ted Baker都要进去看一眼这条dress还在不在.

220镑的价格是我承受不起的, 试了一次, 感觉也是一种宠爱.

直到上周再进店里的时候, 发现视野范围内已然没有它了.

还是会觉得遗憾, 却也觉得, 好幸福.

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/463.html/feed 2 one last cigarette http://callmes.com/posts/460.html http://callmes.com/posts/460.html#comments Fri, 06 Jan 2012 02:08:58 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/?p=460 again i took my very last cigarette and start to blog.

 

how things changed in the past 2 weeks really looks like a drama.

lost someone at some moment, found something at somewhere.

i hope the dark days have been left in the last year,

it’s time to do something on my own.

 

and 2012 is gonna be good, isn’t it?

photo

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/460.html/feed 5 2 am again http://callmes.com/posts/453.html http://callmes.com/posts/453.html#comments Fri, 30 Dec 2011 01:54:30 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/?p=453 i guess it’s not a good thing to look at the old photos again and again.

i took my very last Marlboro and started to think my 2011.

 

in general, it was good. i had a perfect boyfriend and met lots of awesome guys.

can’t believe it’s gonna be 2012 soon. we talked about countdown at the new years eve at london 3 months ago, and the day after tomorrow i’ll actually be under the london eye, waiting for 2012, hoping it’s gonna be amazing.

 

sometimes i wonder what if all the things i keep with me have a memory, how will they tell me about my 2011.

my shoes will tell me where i’ve been, my glasses will tell me what i’ve seen.

 

let me think for a while.

 

Jan. 2011

IMG_0412

it’s all about struggling.

 

Feb. 2011

IMG_1019

it’s all about home.

 

Mar. 2011

IMG_2128

it’s all about friends.

 

Apr. 2011

1302478351415

it’s all about love.

 

May. 2011

1306506212809

it’s all about me.

 

Jun. 2011

IMG_20110608_231422

it’s all about doo.

 

Jul. 2011

1312073060140

it’s all about youth.

 

Aug. 2011

IMG_20110828_202134

it’s all about the little island.

 

Sep. 2011

2

it’s all about england.

 

Oct. 2011

341150_2516262903988_1175681710_32997384_614680879_o

it’s all about having fun.

 

Nov. 2011

IMG_0614

it’s all about london.

 

Dec. 2011

IMG_2257

it’s all about Xmas..

 

Although Xmas turned out unexpected, still, let’s wish for 2012.

It’s all about YOU, you won’t leave me, will you？ :-)

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/453.html/feed 0 Hello again November. http://callmes.com/posts/423.html http://callmes.com/posts/423.html#comments Fri, 18 Nov 2011 20:27:09 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/posts/423.html My November days used to be damp and depressing, felt like living in a world without sunshine.

20111118-202659.jpg

This November turns to be warm and romantic, although I spend lots of time struggling with essays in lib. Sometimes I wake up and realise that I’m in europe now, I think I should be thankful, to live under this blue sky.

20111118-203346.jpg

I met a few nice people, drank a lot, questioned myself all the time. Has everyone ever tried to find a way to avoid growing up or it’s just me?

20111118-203549.jpg

I thought it’s gonna be a tough year and so it is.

Live fully, love deeply.

May this year be …

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/423.html/feed 1 Je vais bien. http://callmes.com/posts/419.html http://callmes.com/posts/419.html#comments Sun, 06 Nov 2011 19:56:11 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/posts/419.html 334016_2561231188167_1175681710_33034940_1653757793_o

when night falls..

i’ve got so much to tell.

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/419.html/feed 0 2 am http://callmes.com/posts/416.html http://callmes.com/posts/416.html#comments Tue, 18 Oct 2011 01:12:30 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/posts/416.html _DSC0400

i wonder why my room looks so messy, not messy sweet, just messy.

after paid my accommodation fee, i realised it’s such a long time i’m gonna stay here.

i think i need more stuff in my fridge and closet, on my window ledge and desk.

finally my heater is working, won’t feel that cold this winter.

i’ll be on the way, with or without you.

]]> http://callmes.com/posts/416.html/feed 0 to 勺子 http://callmes.com/posts/412.html http://callmes.com/posts/412.html#comments Tue, 06 Sep 2011 16:17:44 +0000 Sabrina http://callmes.com/posts/412.html 晚上无聊又在微博上闲逛很久, 有些人你不关注他/她, 却也想每天去看一眼.

我是个受不得委屈的人. 以前发现被误会了, 总会想方设法的解释清楚, 虽然结果总是更糟糕.

大概是在大四的某一天, 突然意识到, 拼命解释真是个很幼稚的举动. 不愿相信你的人还是不会相信你, 而且他们看着你手忙脚乱慌张无措的样子, 还会觉得很好笑. 而相信你的人, 就从来不会去质疑你.

所以我没有去解释. 我知道我会失去一个很好的朋友, 而且她会恨我, 但是我真的无话可说. 我确实做错了事情, 所以在你想要再跟我说话之前, 我只好躲得远远的.

而且女人有时候很傻, 如果被伤害了, 她们也许会选择去原谅那个男人. 这个时候, 朋友什么的, 都不重要了. 而且也许你并没有真心把我当成朋友过.

我一直觉得自己是一个很大度的人, 从来不会记仇, 不会在小问题是百般纠结. 可是面对在乎的人, 我就会变得很弱. 我会记得每一个细节, 然后不停回想, 不停难受. 把心情写在脸上并不是一件光彩的事情, 我在学, 我在改变. 可是像在这个时候, 我没办法控制自己的情绪, 我很down, 很想把话说清楚.

其实逃避了这么久, 你也没有来问我, 我知道你一定非常失望. 而我看到你现在过得很好, 我真希望有些事情从来没有发生过. 可惜我抹不掉历史, 我永远都只能在你记忆灰暗的地方.

大概你看不到这些东西吧, 大概就这样了. u moved on, so did i.

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